Will it ever end?

The shooting in Overland Park hit home, The doctor and grandson that were shot and killed were from my home town in south central Oklahoma, went to church with the family…

It is Holy Week and Passover for many people but one person wanted to make it Hate week… reports are coming out that he was former leader of the KKK in the area, other reports state that the shooter was yelling Anti- Sematic slurs. Who knows at this moment what is true and what isn’t.

Will it ever end, the hate so many carry deep in their soul for those ‘different’ from themselves? We are born with two fears (falling and loud noises), we are NOT born with hate in our soul, in our mind. Fear and hate are LEARNED…they are taught. Fear often leads to hate. I will freely admit.. I HATE SNAKES!!! Because I am terrified of them and yes that is a legit learned response. I used to catch them as a little girl with a beloved great aunt that taught biology; snakes fascinated me. THEN one night, I crawled in bed and something slithered up my leg.. my older brother had put in my bed, a bull snake longer than I was tall. So at that moment I LEARNED to HATE and FEAR snakes!

Thankfully I was not taught to fear and/or hate people that happened to be different from the standard normal. I do not care what color a person is, nor do I care about their religion or lack of, their sexuality or quirky ways. I was taught to care about ‘their heart’. Are they good, are they kind? Are they nice to my family and friends? That is good enough for me! It is not MY place to judge them, that will happen a lot higher up than I some day!

I remember my Papaw one time stated about another rancher that we shared a fence with, ” I am not fond of that man” but I knew the rancher was mean and he cursed a lot and would cut fences to allow his cows to graze on our land and let our bulls cover his cattle (that mean old man did not even own a bull because he knew he would ‘use’ ours). That remark was said on a very hot August day in southern Oklahoma while we were once again repairing fence line. Papaw did not say he hated that rancher, he did not curse and wish the man burned in hell… nothing other than he wasn’t fond. That made a lasting impression on an impressionable youngster.

I learned that day if I am not fond of someone, to just avoid them! I learned that day if I MUST be around someone I am not fond of, I still need to be myself, and treat them as I want to be treated and just hope that someday they will return the ‘favor’ of kindness. If they don’t return kindness with kindness it is their personal problem, not mine. To never lower myself to their standard but rather, attempt to bring them up to mine. Now with that being said… I have certainly failed that at times because there is a little catch to things called being human. I stumble and I have even face planted in complete failure. It does not stop me from getting up, apologizing and trying to do better!

I do not understand the kind of hatred that was shown in the shooting. I do not understand the hatred shown towards those that are same sex couples when they want to marry, I do not understand the hatred shown to those of a different color; I just do not get it! Thank Heavens I do not get it!!! And I hope and pray that you and yours never ‘get it’ either. Lets go through our days with a smile on our face, much easier to share than hate! Lets do the random acts of kindness. Lets work to teach good rather than bad! Lets work together to remove hate. Lets TEACH each other about differences. Knowledge often removes fear, fear often removes hate. I pray for the sake of my grandchildren that their world will be a more kind and gentle world!

Passover blessings to my Jewish friends and a Wonderful Holy Week to my Christian friends! (Those are the only two religions I know anything about, so if you wish to teach me about others, go for it! I will happily learn and remove a level of ‘fear).

Go with peace and a smile!!!

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…and I tick people off, SIGH

I stay on my facebook page more often than here, mainly because I do NOT have this figured out. It is funny though, here, I worry that I will do ‘something wrong’ and offend someone by not using proper etiquette. Over there, totally different story. I speak my mind, I post what I want and I tell stories on myself when I am a total goober…

 

  With that being said, I also tend to call it as I see it. Seems I ticked off someone last night… LITTLE girl beauty pageant, Junior class fund raiser, being held a little before the ‘real’ Miss Comanche contest. 56 candidates in several age/grade groups. It was hot which tends to make most people grumpy (and we won’t even go in it about the person a couple of seats down suffering with horrid gas and kindly allowing everyone else to suffer as well). So I spoke about it on my page… it took FOREVER, babies had to wait AGES before judging and blah blah. So I was ‘called out’ about it and one remark was,   “And your granddaughter won her division surely it was worth the wait but to advertise it was the worst ran certainly takes the air out of my balloon. Tons of hours and manpower went into it in a short time”. I had said one of the worst ran things I had been to in a long time (and I go to a LOT of events, as booking agent and road manager for my husband’s band).
Nope, I am not so shallow as to complain (about an HOUR before the ‘crowning) and then go all googly eyed because the grand daughter won (and yes I AM a very proud Gamma). I said what I thought. Should I have been more kind? Maybe. Phrased it differently? Perhaps…back down and delete the post because the grand daughter won? Hell no! There was a person on the phone telling someone else it was in the top ten of their most miserable times ever. When the person near me also quipped at the crowning of the different age groups “Please hold all of your yawns until all have been crowned’ got laughs coupled with groans it made me know beyond doubt  I was NOT alone in my thoughts!
Oh I got told all about how nothing but kind, wonderful, flowing praise had been said… of course except for MY rude, hurtful, hateful remark! Oh I know the people that worked long hard hours… its a small town. I like them too but it was poorly ran. Cut and dried!
So either the miserable remark was a phantom… and the grand parents I saw leave before their grand daughter’s group even made it to the stage was an illusion and it was all hunky dory and I am a horrible evil person.. OR others live in fantasy land! Sure, hard work DID go into making it happen, not trying to take that away from anyone. Sure there were a lot of girls…(that MIGHT have been a warning to make sure there was plenty of help on hand? Or to double check the scheduling?) But when Pre K children through 8th grade are still up on a school night at 10 pm and they will have to go home, wash off makeup and wash the hairspray out of their hair AND several will catch their school bus at 7 am… it took too long, ran too late and poorly ran. 
So maybe, I was the only brassy enough to say something but I truly hope there are NO illusions that it went perfect. The non working ac wasn’t the pageant director’s fault, finally thinking to place fans almost 2 hours in to the pageant, well… THAT could have been done sooner. The stifling heat though certainly helped boost water sales though!
I truly try to be kind, I truly try not to hurt a person’s feelings. but I also tend to call things as I see it. I do not know if the remark about the grand daughter winning was meant to hurt or to make some unknown point. I will not lose sleep over it though.
Sigh… I know I should apologize for my choice of words… but I won’t, at least not yet.
Some day… SOME DAY I am going to figure this blogging out… and goodness sakes alive… I hope I don’t start a firestorm here too!!! Hahaha but if I do, thank goodness most of the people that read this do not know me so when I am out and about won’t worry about a rock being thrown at me hahaha!! Hugs to all.
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I tell funnies, on myself…(and hubby might play an important roll in one funy.)

I stay on my facebook page more often than here, mainly because I do NOT have this figured out. It is funny though, here, I worry that I will do ‘something wrong’ and offend someone by not using proper etiquette. Over there, totally different story. I speak my mind, I post what I want and I tell stories on myself when I am a total goober…( a later post will explain this a little better, I hope)

Today’s chance to laugh at me:

My friends and family know I embrace the warm… 100 degree weather doesn’t phase me. Mary Winters Branch has a thermostat very similar to mine… YAY but last night…. it was HOT at the pageant, even she and I would go out to catch some cool… well, we decided it is ALL Bud’s fault! He had said all along I would have to do the driving to and from so he could work; that was fine with me because we will get to our destination faster. So as we start out, he complains that the ac in the car sure isn’t working as well as it should… I crank the fan and he is happier. We stop to eat and when we get back in the car, I turn down the fan some because.. I am FREEZING….. he is still burning up…I close my vents to push more air his way…he IS SWEATING, I am shivering (and yes each side has its own control/temp setting).. We are near Chickasha when the words start coming out!! Rapid fire!! The seat warmer was on high from the last time I sat in THAT seat…. LMAO he was ‘relieved’ that he wasn’t ill or anything but how long does it take someone to think… wow my back and bottom sure is hot, I wonder why!!! Mary and I do not think the ac was out at the school, we think it was all the heat Bud absorbed on the way down!!!!!!!
and, I posted this about a week ago…
your chance to laugh at me!!! Today, Grant had trimmed a LOT of limbs and cut down a couple of trees.. sooo we all were out in full force to get the limbs hauled to a different part of the yard..(out of the neighbor’s) Well we were down to the small stuff.. I start pushing the trash cart over.. it is open and then, I leaned it to make it easier to push.. I, in my graceful wonder, step on THE LID… and down I went… on the lid and learned.. I will even fit IN the trash cart.. yes.. it WAS FUNNY!!! #iamadork
 
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The long and winding…

tale (or in this case, tail), that leads you to my plea:

I grew up small town USA, it is a strange little area, because while there are towns spotted around the county, the COUNTY more than the towns is home, one place. You can be from Duncan or Comanche, Marlow or Central or Empire or Loco, you can be from Velma or Alma…or even from Grandview AREA, Tucker AREA… but… say you are from Stephens County and people smile, nod and if they are not your kin folk, odds are they KNOW your kin folk! There are in county rivals, there is town envy BUT let a non county resident speak ugly about any part of OUR county and there is hell to pay.

There are cliques, there are snobs, there are the local poor folk; there are the town folk and the country folk… there are good people and there are bad people; there are groups that welcome all and there are groups that do their level best to keep ‘outsiders’ out. There are the gossip mongers and there are those that hear a lot but refuse to carry tales. This is all important because you need to understand the dynamics to grasp the following story.

Back in July, I received a frantic call for help from a young lady I have watched grow up, went to school with a slew of her family members, she is close friends with my children. She was at wit’s end. She raises registered mini Australian Shepherds. Her stud got out July 4th, she had been searching for him to no avail. She had called the local COUNTY humane society and was told he was not there. She posted on her Facebook wall pictures of the dog. I had even shared his picture over on my page, shared the pictures on all of the lost pet pages I knew of…Well, she decided to take pictures of the dog to the shelter and as she was talking to the director… SHE HEARD HER DOG!. He heard his momma and was going bonkers! She was told, he could not be her dog because he was not the breed she was looking for! The shelter had misidentified her dog to be another breed. With the pictures and the dog’s reaction there was no doubt, SO she was told she could have him back but their rules are all adopted animals must be spayed or neutered. they kept insisting that it was the law and she could not have him until that happened AND it was scheduled to happen the very next day. I made some calls to board members and kept getting the run around. They all had the little mantra of, it is the law… In Oklahoma it IS the law that adopted animals must be fixed. But the law also says, reuniting a pet with their rightful owner is exempt from that law and any rules a humane society might have. So, I took to my Facebook page asking for help. And help came rolling in but so did story after story after story about wrong doings going on at the Stephens County Humane Society. I had heard rumors before, generally ignored them because it had never really affected me or mine. This problem was a little closer to home but not quite in my on backyard so to speak… yet.

She got her dog FINALLY, intact and life rocked on. I still took food occasionally to the shelter and supported events like Bark in the Park. Because even with that glitch in the system it is a needed service, the county animals need the SCHS.

WELL….SIGH. My daughter in law and my youngest son are moving into a farm home I am building. It is WONDERFUL because I spend a lot of time at my OKC home and less time on the ranch. I pay a dog/house sitter to care for the ranch dogs and this will let them save money to build on the family ranch and it saves me a lot too! They are currently living with my middle child who has already built his home on the ranch since their old farm home sold much faster than expected.

The kids have a younger female bloodhound and an older yellow lab. Right before Thanksgiving the bloodhound went missing and with 240 acres to cover with that nose of hers, really figured she would show up any moment. We all looked around the county roads, asked neighbors and learned someone saw the dog being loaded up… they did NOT get a good look at the truck. Can we say HEARTBROKEN learning Freya had been stolen. My kids did NOT file a report with the sheriff’s office because, they have a lot of things to deal with other than a dog… (Stephens county has a horrid meth problem). The FIRST mistake the kids made!

WELL with all the looking and hoping, Lo an behold, SCHS suddenly has a picture of ‘Orange Blossom’ on their page up for adoption… it is FREYA!!! YAY… found! Now all that needs to be done is get her and bring her home. Oh… wait we forgot, this is a humane society that (the best any of us can learn) averages 20 kills a week, and they would rather put an animal down than rehome it ( that was emotion speaking, I do not know it as a fact that they prefer killing to rehoming, it just SEEMS that way to me). MY kids were denied their dog. MY daughter in law was allowed to visit the dog, she was allowed to go back to ALL of the animals with no worker with her.. all alone! She visited with Freya and when she went up front to talk about getting her dog, poor baby Freya was howling and crying. But Melissa was told by the board she was not allowed her pet because, there was ‘no reaction;. The rumor mill swirled and is still swirling as Freya is still in doggie prison. My daughter in law has been allowed to visit the dog more than once but she has NEVER been accompanied by a worker!!!

Now something to also hold on to, in Oklahoma, dogs are personal property! But, while pictures were shown, the kids were told, pictures do not count because all bloodhounds look alike! When a wonderful community leader vouched for ownership, considering she had given the dog to the kids, the board’s reply was, 10, 20 or 100 can vouch and ‘we’ (the board) will not accept it.

My kids FINALLY agreed to take the playmate dogs (after a month and a half) to ‘let the dogs prove ownership). Which ALSO is NOT acceptable in any court of law. They had to meet on a VERY cold day. Freya’s first time in a run area and out of her pen. AT the shelter, WITH police present (still no explanation on why the shelter called the police which is legally, intimidation). Momma was nervous, the lab and my other son’s mini Aussie were both on edge since Mom was literally shaking (remember the gossip mongers and rumor mill? She had been told there would be police there to TAKE the other dogs too so half of THAT rumor was true)..But she loves her fur baby enough to at least try. Well, the dogs acted just like our children at that very moment we NEED them to be on best behavior but THEY decide otherwise! The new place, smelling the fear of mom, overwhelming amount of ‘other animal scents'; the dogs acted uhmm not on their best behavior so again, the kids were denied their dog! They are not even allowed to adopt her. No one in the county… according to the rumor mill is going to be allowed to adopt her! Because SCHS does not want some one to adopt Freya and give her back to her rightful home. My kids made some missteps trying to reclaim their beloved fur baby but, the overall wrong on behalf of SCHS is overwhelming due to the fact ‘they’ are supposed to be the experts.

So, the digging started in on SCHS… and there are no posted bylaws, several people have requested them (not any of US… literally figure we would be charged with trespassing right now). They have not refused to give them copies, just told, they have no copies available at this time… Can not find a single person that has ever seen notice of meetings posted on the court house doors (even friends that work there do not recall ever seeing one),

So with this long sad tale of tails… I am asking, has anyone ever dealt with a problem such as this? Do you have advice? Can you at least offer up prayers or positive thoughts or good feelings? AND hope the meeting this coming week with an attorney goes well. (SHEESH it would be cheaper to just go buy a blood hound than to go through this craziness, point is, a much loved fur baby is not home where she belongs). And… with this craziness, why in the world would some one go through this if it weren’t their baby?! Sheesh… and, sigh.

I warned y’all when I started this blog, it would often contain what is on my mind at the moment…

Best I can offer in wisdom right now is ALWAYS chip your babies, take ten million pictures of your fur babies and make sure every person that comes in contact with your fur baby is in a picture with them… And, sit down and love your fur baby after you read this…

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A new Year, a new chance

This has been a year of ups and downs for many. My family had a loved one murdered (RIP Chris Lane)… never thought THAT would happen. My middle child lost some beloved Marine Brothers to PTSD suicide. He also went through a divorce. My other children have also faced trials and tribulations. We have emerged victorious. I love facebook and am determined to better understand how this blog thing works and ‘blog’ at least weekly (ok I am sure at least one person just groaned) but right now, sharing a thing from my FB page… there is a lot of bad stuff going on right now but that will come a little later because it will include a plea of help maybe.. but right now… let us start the day with silliness??

A new day, the beginning of a new year… SO being the kind person I am, thought I would share some of my wisdom and thoughts:
Nudists do not eat bacon…okay, maybe they do but some one else surely cooks it for them.
Good people do bad, bad people do good (sometimes)
Lose some one you love and it does NOT ‘get better with time’ it only gets ‘different with time’.
No matter how old you are, how long you have known a person; when things happen (divorce, death… whatever) you do NOT know what to say. But they do know at least you are trying.
Resolutions SUCK, you are also setting yourself up to fail. Instead, you should set goals every day when you wake up and concentrate on THAT DAY only.
Your farts only smell ‘good’ to you, not to all that are around you!
Some things do NOT belong on social media!
Wait, a LOT of things do NOT belong on Social Media!
There sure a lot of people really fanatically passionate about sports.
Most people act really stupid upon occasion because of the aforementioned fanatical passion.
There is no reasoning with a person who prefers to keep their mind closed.
There is no talking to a person who keeps their mind so open everything falls out.
Children will NOT understand that a spanking is for their own good… spank them but do not say those stupid asinine words!
Your children really will NOT know how much you love them until they have their own.
Grand children are God’s gift to you for not killing your own.
Most parents understand why some species eat their children.
When your child is acting up, and you say I hope you have one just like you someday, they WILL wonder, why do you hate them.
We can secretly hope that some they have one just like them, unless we have to baby sit…
Politic differences causes more enemies than imaginable.
Politics cause both sides to act like asses at times.
The masses are asses.
Friends are God’s gift to you to apologize for some of your family members.
Blood is NOT thicker than water, feelings are though!
Even though you saw it on the internet, it might NOT be true!
Even if you saw it on my page… it probably IS NOT true… but it is true that it caught my eye
Even though I post something, it does NOT mean it is automatically up for debate. AND if you would NEVER dream of ‘doing that on your page, because you like a happy page, afford me that same courtesy! STFU… (just saying). IF after a post a person says something like, “Thoughts? Opinions?” Then, you are probably being given the green light to spout your views.
Life is not fair, no one owes you a thing, but you owe yourself a lot… YOU owe yourself to try and be the best person you can be, (those around you will benefit from your effort). You owe it to yourself to try to make the best out of all situations. You owe it to yourself to love yourself!
You make your own happiness! Others can contribute towards your happiness but that can not make you happy; that is 100% on you!
Flicking boogers is not cool, Flipping burgers is cool if it means you are helping to support yourself and/or others rather than living solely on public dole.
Another name for pig snot is ham boogers.
Some people actually think I have a tendency to be a smart ass!
2013 has been a trying year for many people because of wide ranges of reason. We have survived the roller coaster ups and downs we call life.. Welcome 2014. Give it your best shot… we can handle it!!!!

 

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I have seen/heard quite a few people  wanting all the stupid fuss over DD to be done! UGH… ANOTHER ‘what’s on my mind’. If you do not stand for something you will fall for anything comes to mind first… Sure, it took a celebrity getting in the news to have people band together on one side or the other with a few napping on the fence. What is next? NO one allowed to express an opinion? No one safe from retaliation (being fired) for expressing a differing opinion? It is part of the arrogant attitude of You owe me, I am right you are wrong, Ohhhh I am offended (you looked at me cross eyed… or whatever). So, roll your eyes over this issue (or any/all issues). That IS your right and I am thrilled you are enjoying it but some day when YOUR freedom of self expression, speech, thoughts and opinions are restricted please continue and say nothing. And no, I am NOT saying you need to take a stance on this.. but several NEVER take a stance, never say anything stronger than Why should I care? IT isn’t happening to me… but it CAN and it will be easier the next time…You also are more than welcome to NOT make your stances public on here… hopefully you make them ‘public’ by writing letters, making phone calls, offering donations to the groups you support. HOPEFULLY you do not sit back expecting everyone else to always fight a battle and allow you to reap the rewards by proxy, but some of you do just that… some day, no matter what the battle may be; there will be no more warriors left and you will be sitting all alone wondering what in the world happened? So please, find YOUR passion and act upon it!!!!
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Agree or disagree, Phil got us pretty riled up

Been thinking about this Phil thing…IMHO, PC takes over and a person is not being allowed to speak their thoughts… yes A&E can fire him because he did not take a popular stance (even though a few obscure sites are releasing his ‘contract’ and it appears possible that A&E violated it but not sharing since I can not confirm it is the real deal) . Back in the 50’s a few brave souls exited the clo…sets and were fired and it happened in the 60s and the 70s and the 80s and on and on… I think we can all agree that was/is wrong! They had/have the right to be happy, be honest, without fear of persecution and  discrimination…What if this man had said something against those that are obese? What if he had said he thought all obese people would not inherit the Kingdom because they are sinners (gluttony) and how he thinks it is wrong there are so many cooking shows that lead them in to temptation. And that he thinks that fast food places should not be allowed to sell to obese people and on and on…did you know that stats show that less than 5% (the latest Gallop poll put the number at 3.7%) are gay and that number stays true to studies over the years. Currently more than 60% are obese (just one study I found)… I do not care if you are gay, I do not care if you are overweight (other than I might worry about your health). IF you are my friend or family, I love you, done deal. I DO care that we have moved in to a knee jerk reaction. Paula Deen was fired for something she said 20+ years ago… I am crying for mercy STILL on that one… (I know I do and I bet you too have things back in the day that we are not proud of, cringe when we remember it..) The man had the right to speak how he feels. It does not mean we have to agree, but it SHOULD mean we need to understand that either we fight for his right or realize we, you and I, are next on speaking our thoughts, beliefs, feelings… I hear people saying often. love the sinner hate the sin, this could apply here to ya know…I do not agree with Phil (we all make our relationship with God personal) but I damned sure feel he had/has the right to say what he believes…So do you, and so do I!
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